Faithful Working Mom

It’s easy to read the story of John the Baptist and his interaction with the religious leaders in Matthew 3: 7-10 with a self-righteous attitude. Of course, I’m not the Pharisee or the Sadducee in the story – I’m on the winning team! I would never…wait…actually…

That’s exactly the heart of a pharisee: self-righteousness.

I’m reading through the New Testament this year, and with the shorter daily readings, it’s helping me to slow down, pause, ask more questions, and examine my heart – the thing that was lost on the Pharisees and Sadducees in Jesus’ day, and the thing that is so easily forgotten if I’m not careful, if we all are not careful.

In Matthew 3, John the Baptist is gaining in popularity, calling people to repentance and baptizing them:

⁷ But when he saw many of the Pharisees and Sadducees coming to where he was baptizing, he said to them: “You brood of vipers! Who warned you to flee from the coming wrath? ⁸ Produce fruit in keeping with repentance. ⁹ And do not think you can say to yourselves, ‘We have Abraham as our father.’ I tell you that out of these stones God can raise up children for Abraham. ¹⁰ The ax is already at the root of the trees, and every tree that does not produce good fruit will be cut down and thrown into the fire.

In this passage, the Pharisees were coming to John, who called all people to repentance. But the Pharisees didn’t come to repent themselves, but only to see what all the hullabaloo was about. The attention was coming off of them as John’s ministry was gaining momentum. They wanted to make sure that they had all the power, position, and popularity. They were obsessed with the law. So much so that they made up more laws to protect the law. They missed the whole point.

As a rule-follower and recovering people-pleaser, I’d like to think that I have it all together, and I would never be in the camp of the self-righteous religious leaders of the day. But oh, how I can lean into my pharisaic tendencies more than I’d like to admit.

In my self-righteous, self-centered, left-to-my-own sinful nature state, I am often more like the Pharisees in this story: puffed up with pride, judgmental of others, and blind to my own despair.

My default nature:

• I want my “Christian” name, identity, and “works” to be enough most days. Pharisee.
• I want to look good on the outside, while inside I’m not so great. Pharisee.
• I want to be the center of attention. Pharisee.
• I want to call out other people’s unrighteousness but ignore my own. Pharisee.
• I want to be the “keeper of the law,” have the final word, or have all the answers. Pharisee.
• I don’t want to do the hard work of examining my heart. Pharisee.

The pharisees didn’t want to change. They were so focused on the wrong things to even recognize that their hearts were far from God.

But true repentance requires heart change.

Even as I read this passage, identifying more with the brood of vipers in this story, God assured me that he is with me and that I’m a redeemed Child of God – not a Pharisee.

They loved the rules and were good at holding other people to those rules, but they missed the point. The rules are only there to point us to repentance in Christ. The rules let us know that we’re not perfect and that we need Jesus. If we’ve humbled ourselves, repented of our sins, and put our faith in Christ, then we can live in freedom from the law and live by faith.

Charles Spurgeon said:

“The law is for the self-righteous, to humble their pride: the gospel is for the lost, to remove their despair.”

In my forgiven and freed, leaning-on-Jesus, humbled state of mind, I can reframe my heart from Pharisee to forgiven.

My humbled heart:

• I can rest on the name of Jesus, identify with him alone, and let his finished work on the cross be enough (Galatians 2:20). Forgiven.
• I can pray, examine my heart, and ask God to reveal to me the things I need to change (Psalm 139:23-24). Forgiven.
• I can give God the glory and credit for everything good in my life (Romans 11:36). Forgiven.
• I can show grace to others and pray for less mature believers, knowing that God through the work of the Holy Spirit can change people (Ephesians 4:32 & Colossians 3:13). Forgiven.
• I can let God’s Word speak for itself, rest in the truth of Scripture, and know it does not return void (Isaiah 55:11). Forgiven.

This tension between desire and perfection didn’t just show up in my faith, it showed up the moment I became a mom.

When I was pregnant with my son, I called a friend and confessed that I was worried I wasn’t going to be a good mom. I didn’t feel equipped and I was fearful I was going to get it wrong. She told me that just having those fears and thinking ahead about my relationship with my son – and having the desire to do right and be a good mom – made me a good mom already.

That conversation helped me see that repentance works the same way: God isn’t waiting for flawless obedience, but for a heart that knows it needs Him.

I had the desire to do right but knew I wasn’t going to be perfect. And I think that’s what God is looking for in us. A desire – for Him alone. He knows our weaknesses and human limitations. He knows we are going to mess up, yet he’s patient with us. He’s not looking for perfection or waiting for us to mess up so he can punish us. He’s looking for our heart – that desire to want to please Him out of a grateful, forgiven heart.

Grace and hope are in my future.

In my freed and forgiven, walking-in-grace ways, I still fail. I still have Pharisee moments. I still drift toward self-reliance, self-focus, and self-righteousness. But I don’t stay there. Because I belong to a Savior who doesn’t crush repentant hearts; He restores them.

He reminds me, again and again, that I am not defined by my failures or my efforts, but by His finished work (Ephesians 2: 8-10). And every time I turn back to Him, I’m met not with condemnation, but with grace. Praise God, I have a Savior who is patient, slow to anger, and abounding in love. (Psalm 103). I don’t have to be perfect to be forgiven. I just have to be willing to come back, and that makes all the difference.

As you close this post, ask yourself:
Am I living today as someone trying to earn God’s approval, or as someone already forgiven?

Then rest in this truth: God isn’t asking for perfection. He’s asking for your heart.

Run your race on purpose. Stay faithful. Finish well.